Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize