Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Randomize