i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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