i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Randomize
