using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
