Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
