Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
