real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
