I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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