I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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