Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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