and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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