I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
