"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Randomize
