just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
