What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
