i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
i think im in europe. pls send help
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize