It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
