That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Just took my morning after pill in the library
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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