threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
