don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
