she was so not down for the gang bang
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize