Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(713): View more from Texas

I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?

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(802): View more from Vermont

elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.

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(224): View more from Illinois

The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway

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(406): View more from Montana

This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.

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(208): View more from Idaho

This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?

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(302): View more from Delaware

This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.

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