I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Well I just put wine in my tea
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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