If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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