I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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