R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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