Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
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