his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
