areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
