I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
We're too hungover to prance.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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