the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize