i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Why did my mother make you get naked?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
