She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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