Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
