i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
