Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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