I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
