He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize