Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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