I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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