the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Let's get the cat blown out
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
