I don't usually arrange sex via text message
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Drake has all the answers
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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