i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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