office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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