just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
