i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I'm experimenting with sincerity
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
