The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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