My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I just gift wrapped bread.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
He has the fingertips of a God
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
