is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
