he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize